Monday, October 30, 2006


Ages ago, two male friends of mine offered to donate their sperm. One guy insisted on doing it the old-fashioned way (eew!) so we immediately excluded him as a possibility. The other guy travels on the job and is only home for a couple of days out of the month, so he got excluded by default, as it is too hard to coordinate with someone who is never around.

In the meantime, one of my close male friends, H, has made comments here and there, jokingly, about donating. But now I'm wondering if he's really joking, or if he'd sincerely agree, should I approach him. You see, he's made jokes in the past that turned out to not be jokes, so I'm wondering if this is one of those situations. R and I have thought about approaching him, but my goodness, how the heck am I supposed to do that? I have no clue what to say. I don't want him to feel pressured or wierd, ya know.

Any thoughts?


J said...

If you're interested in him being a donor, I'd be plainly honest about it, perhaps saying something like "hey - you've joked about being a donor for us....what are your real feelings about it?"

If he says "uh, I was only joking," well, then, you know your answer.

vee said...

"In the meantime, by best friend, JH, has made comments here..."

I thought maybe you'd just asked him on the internet until I read that properly!!

I say ask him. We've asked several blokes. Although only one actually said yes, we learned a lot just by asking and were able to put those others out of our minds as potential donors and move on, which was a relief, as we were sending ourselves crazy imagining what if they said yes.

It's probably one of the hardest and weirdest conversations you'll ever have with your friend, but you won't know if you don't ask!

If you do go for it, I'd suggest giving him time to think (even if he says yes straight away) and also giving him a fixed date to tell you his answer, so you won't be left hanging on.

Good luck!!